2020

Nothing nothing nothing happened this year

people died

my grandmother died

between so many pointed fingers that everything got lost.

Nothing to tell about a heart left to collect dust

nothing to say in differentiating from white to grey

nothing to comment on in losing the burning of alcohol.

Everything was a repetition that became the code in the system and the beginning of the robots in the human.

All left to the betrayal of the fatigue that is watching the window like television.

There are no letters to formulate everything that did not happen,

for all that was left in the burial of too much pain and nothing.

It was forgotten and retired this year in a way that felt like a Monday through Sunday that was lost in the blink of a rotten society.

Nothing happened

Except my youth turned to arteries of rocks and suicidal mentality

Nothing happened

Except that everything proposed became the end of a joke drowned in supplications of tears that killed

Nothing happened

Except losing faith that there would be a balance waiting for us at the end of it all.

Ta.

The bad writer

I doubt

I doubt

I doubt

being good

being able

to have the courage

to expose the column

and let the world play with it

I doubt

to allow a map of my arteries to be created

that my language can be learned

I make it basic for everyone to jump the rope with it

I doubt

I can go on, because I fear the world will catch what I say when my fingers get lost on the keyboards

And my lips read like they running from love 

I doubt

that I should continue with this massacre that is

evil to me

to you

and all

because the Gods have not blessed me

I have no one saying that there is greatness in me

I don't have a spirit to break

to expose me to a broken mirror

and glasses in gallery

so that the universe knows what disaster is the life that I try to practice in languages ​​that a child of five talks to adults

I doubt

to reach far

to get ovations

to do speeches

to love

to make torments

that makes the eyes cloud in tears

of celebration

of happiness

of victory

I doubt that what I dream can become a reality

When every word I write comes with a quiver as a signature

TA.

Shadow

When you told me you were leaving, I packed my bags to follow you

when you burned our bridge, I stole Icaru's wings and flew far from the sun

when you lied to me about the date and escaped between the gaps of my fingers, 

I made a deal with the devil and sewed myself to your body as your shadow.

Without both of us wanting it, I found myself chasing your soul to protect it.

If you hurt, I cry and if you go, I follow 

and it is a dependency that could leave many upset.

But you are a mirror for what my demons have trained to control.

So if you are taking diagonals and unknown corners it is fine because I've learned the language of the stars and I know the sound of your footsteps.

If you want to go by boat, I warn you that I have hidden all the coins for payment in the warmth of my heart.

There is no path you take that I won’t follow as an abandoned in life, because between the time we met and we got tangled up, I tied my hand to yours and promised that even in the knowledge of the betrayal I will accompany you as the last ally that you have. 

So go to the high ground and the rebellious sea that I have trained with my life to face nature so you don’t feel the fear and pain that it is to be without someone in your corner.

TA.

Never doubt

Be it at two in the morning

eight at night

 a Sunday without rain

 my birthday

the end of the year

or the death of my grandmother

my exhausted legs will still be there to support your fall.

Even in the trembling of the dawn, don’t hesitate to dial my name

don’t doubt in the shaking of my fingers that still have the strength to hold the blood of your wounds

And when you feel that the world is oppressing you, trust my muscles that they still have the last energy left, for you.

I am one of those who understand that the truth sounds false and that everything that shines is harm to life

However, be it the month you invent, the year you lose, the distance you create, know that if you moan a broken note my lungs can push this body to your land.

I may be of broken promises, of abuse in my childhood, of an abandonment that haunts me, of a sadness that is hopscotch, but I am committed to death.

I am, that without a blood pact I'll go to war for you.

So be it, ten minutes after my birth

fifteen minutes after my love

thirteen minutes after our goodbye

know that my broken bones are prepared to be your pillow

that my voice still knows lullabies

and my eyes for you can find the buried smile

so

please

please

please

please

Don’t hesitate

that if everything falls apart in deceptions and ghosts

that if everything is lost in mist and voices that are distorted echoes

Never

doubt

that I will not skip my life to find you and offer you my heart as a lifeline.

TA.

Hear me out

I stand on the reef

the waves are wetting my feet

I'm shivering with the east wind

the sun burns my skin,

the world is holding its breath

while

I proclaim

I order

them to listen when I shout that

I LOVE YOU

I swear to you that my cells were made to meet you

that everything in my being is a compass that points to you

we are metal and magnet

and nature stumbles me so that I fall into your arms.

I climb to the treetops

the birds stop their flights

my hands bleed from the branches

my throat dries up in the warm wind

but I still sigh that

I love you

because I promise you that my legs fall but my arms push to look at your eyes and meet me for the first time,

I have books, libraries, universities of the knowledge that I have learned of you

everything I have done, every mistake and correction has led me to the shooting that is to grab your hand and steal you.

I want you to understand that I stand at the coldest point of the poles,

with the trembling in the bones,

the seals' sing,

the penguins' dance

the cold is taking my life but I say between broken lips that

I love you

because I want you to know that what built this universe put me there to create paths that always lead me to you

TA.

The walk

I'll take the cobbled street

Where you lose your first cigarette

I’ll go alone, it is better than bad company

I'll go looking for I don't know

A distraction

A breath

A dodge

I'll probably go on a Sunday

Between three and four

That is when the world takes its breath

I'll drag my feet as if I'm looking to take flight

With the fingers making the wind his piano keys

I'll be with the smile caught in my eyes

Counting the meters that separate me from the ground to the clouds

I’ll be, most likely, distracted

Trying to remember where I was headed

I’ll go down the street where the trees still like to give the cold summer shade

I’ll go in silence, but humming that song that I have stuck since I thought I had crossed you between three avenues and a continent.

I’ll be meditating questions that haunt me in the hours that sleep weighs on me and I’ll be a stumble waiting to happen,

I’ll walk through the streets where my steps have an echo in all the balconies and I can be without feeling all the looks that are imaginations

I’ll go without hesitation

With head held high

With crooked feet

And with the lips

To say

Oh, it's you I was looking for.

TA.

Boxing bag

The heart

I have it

of crumbs scattered

map divided into enemies

I gave it to everyone who had silence as a help

A harp with wind fingers that cried for those who didn’t dare to lament.

I have it to shreds for having moulded it into a boxing bag so that everyone who visits has a piece of peace.

So it has been,

forgotten that this organ is what keeps me alive,

rejected that with one more blow I die,

denied that each person who said he loved me is tattooed in it to then leave me.

My life I have it,

like marzipan that I let anyone take

like cotton candy that I carry to the height of whims.

  I leave it free and without a  shed

still believing that maybe one day someone will point it’s way to me.

TA.